behind the scenes

So this is very flattering, especially since I’ve enjoyed many of Ms. Bussel’s Village Voice columns…

Behind the scenes stuff, eh? Hmm … well, this was a funny story in today’s paper:

How derriere you, judge?
He boots butt-patting abuse case
BY ADAM NICHOLS
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER

How does this grab you, ladies?

A Manhattan judge has dismissed charges against a fabric merchant accused of patting a customer’s bottom — saying the lewd move wasn’t a crime.

Criminal Court Judge Richard Weinberg said “something more than mere touching is required” to find a defendant guilty of forcible touching. …

The judge’s decision was panned by some city women.

“I bet the judge was a man,” said Yvette Saferstein, 38, a social worker from Astoria, Queens. “If someone came up to me in a store and patted my butt, I would go berserk. It’s harassment and it’s offensive.”

But Shani Castri, a Little Italy resident in her 30s who works in the fashion industry, said, “People should chill a little bit. If he grabbed her, fair enough. But if it was just a pat, it happens. If I had to take to court every guy who touched my butt, I’d be there all the time.”

The best part: Before going out to get the woman-on-the-street quotes, Nichols is discussing about how great it would be if he ran his own Daily News Special Investigation, patting woman’s butts to see their reaction. This is actually discussed at length among co-workers.

Then, while out on the street, he text-messages excitable female reporter C. “I’m in the back of a police cruiser!”

Then he calls fellow reporter Jose Martinez, lets him in on prank. Martinez gets off phone, is hanging his head … “oh no, Nichols tried it — and it backfired, big time!”

So C. goes running to the editors to give them the news … “Nichols was out patting woman’s asses for a story, and got arrested!”

One yells, “What! We didn’t tell him to go grab women’s asses!” There was a little bit of general pandemonium before Martinez announced they’d been punked, big time…

(These quotes are from memory & aren’t exact … posted with Jose and Adam’s permission)